|
RISING WOMEN EXPERTS...
Help, my primary relationship isn’t working? Is it to late to fix it?
By Jan Mitchell of Expanding Minds
Women tell me “My relationship isn’t working...”, or “I love him but...”
They want to fix what is wrong in the relationship or they want “him” to
change. But improving your relationship(s) includes cleaning up personal
fears, perceptions, issues, boundaries plus listening and communication
skills. As you untangle the confusion and co-dependence, you see yourself
and others clearly develop a positive attitude, more choices, better
boundaries, and stronger relationships. Following are 5 strategies to
improve relationships:
1) Your relationship doesn’t fulfill your needs... The jokes
about what a man needs and what a woman needs are based on truths. It is
unrealistic to expect your needs to be filled by one person. Build a
positive support system, learn to meet you own needs and improve
communication.
2) You are not compatible... Understand how you and your
partners personalities relate and deal with life’s up’s and down’s.
Visualize yourself communicating with your partner better. Read
Love...What’s Personality Got To Do With It? by Carol Ritberger.
3) You feel unheard... Your partner is not a mind reader.
Discover what you want or need, and visualize yourself communicating it so
your partner understands.
4) You do the emotional work... You notice what is lacking
emotionally. Men have a different emotional makeup than women and can be
confused by women’s “emotional needs”. Stop the “if he loves me he would...”
Visualize yourself asking clearly for what you want, build a support system
and learn to get your own needs met.
5) You do too much... Heal the past, clean up boundaries, and
develop self confidence and self care.
Exercise 1: Make a list of what needs to change in yourself, your
relationship and your partner, such as confidence, boundaries,
releasing/healing the past, limiting beliefs, negative emotions, self care,
listening, communication, understanding, habits and behaviors. Check off
what is within your control to change. Let go of issues that are out of your
control. Focus on improving yourself and enhancing the positive “we” in your
relationship.
Exercise 2: List your positive qualities and what you bring to the
relationship. List your partner’s positive qualities and what he/she brings
to the relationship. Read this list daily.
Call Jan Mitchell, Master NLP Phone Counselor of Expanding Minds for a
free phone consultation at 403.225.2974.
www.expanding-minds.com |