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RISING WOMEN EXPERT
ADVICE...
I keep ending up in relationships that are going nowhere. Why is there no
one out there for me?
You’re not alone. This is, perhaps, the most commonly asked question among
those who have yet to find that special someone. You might begin by asking
yourself these important questions:
What are you looking for? Most people have no idea what they are looking for
and, therefore, unintentionally end up in the same co-dependent patterns
that haven’t worked for them in the past. Our prototype for relationship
comes mostly from our primary image-makers (the mother/father figures in our
lives). The more consciously aware we are of the patterns contained within
that prototype and what does or doesn’t work for us, the more we are able to
create co-empowered relationships. The tell-tale sign of a co-dependent
relationship is “need”. The more comfortable you are in your own skin, the
less you need someone else to “complete” you or reinforce what you already
believe. Look at the common thread in all of your past relationships. What
co-dependent patterns were continually reinforced? Where did those patterns
originate? What needs to change?
What do you believe? Let’s take a look at the statement, “There is no one
out there for me.” This belief could be your greatest barrier. These are the
words of someone who has stopped seeing opportunities to connect. Our
thoughts and beliefs are powerful tools that are used either consciously or
unintentionally to create our present circumstances. If we believe that
there is no suitable partner for us, we will see all opportunities for
connection through the filter of judgment and create a self-fulfilling
prophesy. Fear-based beliefs create closed symbols that stop us from living
life and actually limit our choices. In this case, connecting to others on
an intimate level may have become a closed symbol for you. Tell yourself the
truth about what you believe. You have not met everyone and, therefore, it
is not possible to honestly say that there is no one out there for you.
We all hold some beliefs that are fear-based. Your belief may be acting as a
buffer, protecting you from the possibility of feeling pain. This buffer
also protects you from feeling love and finding what you’re looking for. To
open this closed symbol, it is necessary to risk opening your heart and
feeling fully.
For more information on how to create healthy relationships, contact Leia
Gamache at WhiteFire Coaching at 403.875.7594, email
what.if@shaw.ca or visit her
website at
www.healing-arts.ca
www.whitefirecoaching.org/index.html
www.whitefirecoaching.blogspot.com
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