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 Reflection
In The Mirror - Understanding Body Image DisordersBy Devon Kirke of Tao-Te-Chi Health Services These days it seems that we are living in a world of negativity and put downs; mostly coming from ourselves. Voicing that we are fat, ugly or other damaging remarks have become all too common in our society. The problem is that these comments can be incredibly damaging to our self-worth or completely destroy our self-esteem; something that should not be allowed to happen. Sadly, most people simply take or make these negative remarks in stride as a part of life without any regard for the damage they can do. What people fail to realize is that this is not some minor problem that can be fixed with cosmetic surgery, working out excessively or even fighting through some diet plan. This is actually a mental dysfunction that totally affects the way we “see” ourselves; which in turn affects the way we deal with ourselves. A “Body Image Disorder” is defined as “viewing ourselves as we think we are, not as we actually are.” This is why we come across people who tip the scales at eighty pounds yet are still adamant that they are too fat. To them when they look in the mirror they do not see the image of skin and bones looking back. What they see is something ugly, overweight and in their mind totally unacceptable. Sadly this is not a dysfunction limited to the thin; it is something that can affect anyone at any time. This is not because we have an inability to see what is happening to us, but because the very nature of the disorder affects what we see. In simple terms we “see” what we expect to see, not what is actually there. This can naturally lead to many eating disorders as well as overeating, super critical nature and more. As with most mental dysfunctions it is the by-product of other complications. By nature people with a Body Image Disorder typically have some other underlying mental issue that is causing it; issues which are quite commonly seen as small and insignificant in our lives. These underlying issues are not small however, and by nature of the disorder we simply do not want to see them as they really are. As a very oversimplified example of this, say at the age of six a child was having fun playing in the mud and naturally got all dirty. When they returned home their parents told them that they looked atrocious, to be further ridiculed or punished. For a fragile young mind that most likely will not put the comment or reaction into context of what they currently look like, this can be devastating. All of a sudden this six-year-old can begin to think that they look fat, ugly or whatever else. Because of the workings of our mind we rate all of our pains, hurts and misery based on how we react to them. If the pain is seen as “life threatening”, whether real or imagined, then the mind and body will take steps to protect it. In most cases, the mind will react by creating the defence of denial. Our mind does this because it truly believes that if we were to face it directly then we would likely die from it. Understand, this is not based on logic or even “sense”; it is simply a by-product of our reaction to the situation at the exact moment that it happened. However it does not mean we are doomed to live with it forever! Regrettably, for most people there is no medication to remove the filter from our eyes, nor is there any powerful psychological treatment. What we can do however is to put it all into perspective. By admitting to ourselves that we do not want to truly see ourselves, no matter what the reason for it is, then we can begin working through it. If we can reach a point that we are willing to admit that there is something we do not want to see then we can easily, though not simply, begin to work towards finding it. One of best ways we can do this, with regards to Body Image Disorders, is to put ourselves in front of a mirror every day and spend some time looking at who we really are. This does not mean glancing when we are brushing our teeth, doing our hair or even putting on make-up. It needs to be special and separate “Mirror Time”! By giving yourself some time to look in the mirror and look at your face, your eyes, your hair and everything else, you can begin to actually see what you really look like. For most people in the beginning this may seem stupid or a waste of time. Others may see it as scary, fearful or even shameful. The reason for this however is the same; our natural mental programming does not want us to look and see because we think something bad will happen. If we can show ourselves some commitment and do this every day for even just five minutes, then we can start to see that it is okay to explore how we really look, in turn, who we really are. We will begin to see that it is not scary or stupid; that there is actually something there we may be afraid to see. The more we work at this and show ourselves that it is all okay, then the more of ourselves we can begin to see. The fact is that by working through all the fear, stress or pre-programming that makes us not want to look, we gain the ability to “SEE”. In the end we will typically begin to feel better about ourselves and we may even begin to like what we see in the mirror. For many people this can help them to feel more empowered, more energized, more in control of their own lives and even more vibrant and alive. It is an amazing feeling to free ourselves from a self-imposed prison; and Body Image Disorders are certainly that. Devon Kirke is the Founder of Tao-Te-Chi Health Services, is a Certified Master Healer, Clairscientient & Spiritual Guide. To Learn more visit www.tao-te-chi.com |