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ASK
OUR EXPERTS...
Are my beliefs holding me back?
By Laura Watson of Venture Coaching
Ask yourself; what do I believe about success? How do I define success? Who
is my role model? If I’m honest with myself, do I believe I’ll be
successful?
I asked each of my clients these questions recently, and we discovered a
disturbing truth. We all carried mostly negative stories and beliefs about
success! Many of us had not defined it, and did not believe we’ll ever be
successful!
When we listed our negative beliefs, many of us created a full page. Beliefs
like, “successful people are arrogant”, “people won’t like me”, “success =
being a bitch” and “I can’t have success and a family”.
In contrast, our list of positive beliefs was much shorter, and many of us
had no positive stories at all. Try it. List all your positive success
stories, write as many as you can.
If we have mostly negative beliefs about success; if we have no role models
and if we believe we aren’t really worthy of success, how do these beliefs
effect our behaviours?
Negative Beliefs = Negative Behaviours - As a business coach, I see how
negative beliefs are the source for many self-sabotaging behaviours.
Behaviours like procrastination, over-committing, avoiding, over-eating,
under-exercising, distracting ourselves, cramming projects into the last
minute and negative self-talk. These behaviours hold us back from achieving
the success we say we want because they are rooted in our belief system that
success is not possible for us. So what do we do?
Change Our Beliefs About Success - If we can make up negative stories about
success, we can make up positive stories too! We can create and adopt new
beliefs that better serve us. Then new, positive behaviours will result from
our new, positive stories. Ok, how do I do that?
Get Help to Make Change - Our negative stories tend to have a life of their
own; they want to survive and don’t want to give up their influence on us.
Having someone in our life who knows us well; who can point out how we
engage in self-sabotage, can make a huge difference in how quickly we adopt
our new beliefs and behaviours.
If you want success and think you are working too hard at it, consider
rewriting your stories. Seek out positive role models and find someone
tactful whom you can accept support from. Then see if your path gets easier!
For more advice on changing beliefs into success, contact Laura Watson
of Venture Coaching at 403.669.8684 or email
laura@venturecoaching.ca
Visit Laura’s website at
www.venturecoaching.ca |
