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RISING WOMEN EXPERT
ADVICE...
My partner is always worried about his right to be himself and gets angry
at the drop of a hat. How can I help?
It sounds like your partner may have temporarily lost his sense of identity
and may be experiencing some fear. What is changing around him? It can
sometimes become important for us to protect our sense of identity during
significant periods of transition, particularly when we are uncomfortable
with change.
Fear has a different face as it travels through the Chakras or energy
centres of our body. Fear can appear as guilt, for example, affecting our
1st Chakra catalyst energy. In other words, when we feel guilty, we are
actually afraid to create something more. When we are unable to cope with
feelings of guilt, the energy pushes upward to our 2nd (Sacral) Chakra and
we lose our centre of gravity or our perspective. We become unwilling to be
accountable and we blame others or blame ourselves. This can be seen as the
first seed of anger.
When our energy rises to the 3rd Chakra (Solar Plexus), we are in “Fear of
the Unknown”. The 3rd Chakra is also the seat of our identity. If we have
lost our centre of gravity, we have also lost a sense of where we are coming
from when we encounter the outside world. We have lost our sense of self.
Anger happens when we cannot cope with the unknown and feel we have no
ground to stand on. It is the enemy of the Heart Chakra and keeps us from
seeing the truth. When anger escalates, our fear rises to the throat, our
5th Chakra, and we experience anxiety. Get overwhelmed with anxiety, and we
experience depression (a 6th Chakra experience).
If your partner is in fear of the unknown, it could be about an unknown
outcome of some external event or it could be about a significant transition
he is experiencing in his inner world. If he is physically abusive, get out
now! Otherwise, it may help to soften your energy and speak to his fear. If
he is angry, leave the space until he is ok. Choose your timing. Then ask,
“What are you afraid of?”
Where did he give his power away? Where did he break his agreements with
himself - to be himself? What new agreements does he need to make? Realize
that the person who has not lost their space has the power to bring things
back into balance. If both of you can keep your agreements with yourselves,
you can make healthy agreements with each other and co-create a better life.
For more information on how to live the life you want, contact Leia Gamache
at WhiteFire Coaching at 403.875.7594 or
what.if@shaw.ca
www.whitefirecoaching.org
www.whitefirecoaching.blogspot.com
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