 Career
Search - Quest or Curse?
By Nina Ham of Success From The Inside Out If
you are a woman in the midst of a career search and are undecided about the next direction
for your work life, you may be struggling to keep your self-esteem strong - at the same
time that you’re trying to answer the all-important question about what you want to
do.
People often seem to be aching for a sympathetic outlook on their
stories of career dissatisfaction. They tend to be their own harshest critics, often
riddled with self-doubt and embarrassment about not getting this “career thing”
right. Maintaining a constructive attitude is challenging. In spite of contrary statistics
- such as, the average American changes jobs eight times over the course of his/her
lifetime - we still tend to harbor the expectation that we “should” decide by
our late 20’s/early 30’s what we want to do and follow that path for the
remainder of our working lives. It is often the case, when facing a challenging
transition, that there is some subtle, or not so subtle, finger-pointing at you saying,
“I must be crazy to contemplate embarking on a new venture in this economy.”
“Maybe I should stop worrying about my calling and get a job.” Or “I have
responsibilities. I can’t afford to look for work I love.”
Whether you’re considering moving from one industry to another or
into self-employment, you’ll probably agree that support systems for people in career
transition are lagging woefully behind the changes that are occurring in the way we do
work. As evidence of this, ask yourself the following:
•What did you learn in your formal education about making
a good career choice?
•When were you encouraged to match your abilities, values,
and personality to career options, and shown how to do it?
•Would you ever consider marrying someone you hadn’t
dated first?
•Were you ever told that what you’re qualified to do, even if
it earns a decent wage, is not sufficient reason to keep doing it?
•Do you know where to go for support and reinforcement to
continue the search for work you are passionate about?
•Do you have models for matching changes in life stages or
circumstances with changes in values or priorities
concerning work?
•Did you know that having an identity crisis or upheaval
every 10 years is considered normal and healthy? (Experts
agree that love and work largely shape adult identity.)
Chances are, your answers to these questions point out how poorly
you’ve been prepared for the transition you’re engaged in. Imagine how different
it would be if we lived in a culture in which the longing to work well - to have work that
fulfills and stretches us - was recognized as one of adulthood’s quests, as equally
human and dignified as the longing to love well or parent well. As the poet David Whyte
tells us so eloquently, creating meaningful work is how we forge our place in the world,
how we create belonging. Many of us find belonging where personal meets personal, in
friendship or intimacy; in work, where personal meets public, a larger sense of belonging
can be claimed. To forge our place we must be fully engaged both with who we are and who
we want to become. Through working we express our unique natures - our values, skills and
creativity - and we challenge ourselves to become even more fully what we’re capable
of. Given this perspective on working well, not only should it take exactly as long as it
takes - with no self-reproach - to do the necessary inner and outer research, but it may
be an on-going, lifelong process. Just as personal change and growth distinguish aliveness
from death, so must we require our work to keep pace with those changes.
The next important question to address, for those of you committed to
the quest for good work, is how to sustain yourself during the process, both practically
and emotionally. Meeting the daily ups and downs of a career search can be a formidable
challenge. Here are some suggestions:
Prepare Financially - Consider either reducing debt to cut monthly
payments, or borrowing money only to repay when you’re re-employed. Also consider
making a temporary job move to give yourself more time with less financial pressure. This
can be a good opportunity to explore some career ideas.
Fortify a Positive Attitude. The territory between your ears can be a
bad neighborhood to hang out in alone at times, especially if there’s excessive
worry, confusion or self-criticism. Make a point to talk with a friend or a professional
on a regular basis. That person is likely to be more objective about you and your
abilities than you are. If you haven’t already, read Po Bronson’s, “What
Should I Do With My Life?” You will realize, with relief, that you’re not alone.
Maintain Perspective. Find a hero or heroine in your personal life or
in the media, someone who has drawn on courage and persistence to continue the search
until finding his or her right work.
Don’t Overlook the Value of Intuition for this Process. Trying to
“figure out” what to do may not be the best way. Let some
insights/hunches/visions come to you. Remember, you’re learning career development
skills here. These are skills that will serve you over the long haul. When you need
inspiration to stay in the quest, try this quote from William Blake:
“In good work that is a heartfelt expression of ourselves, we
necessarily put our very identities at risk. Perhaps it is because we know, in the end, we
are our gift to others and the world.”
You ARE Your Gift to the World. Finding where and how to give that gift
isn’t always easy, but surely devoting yourself to the endeavor is one of the most
important investments you can make. Good luck!
Nina Ham of Success From The Inside Out, is a certified
coach & a licensed psychotherapist. Her 6-week Career Quest program helps people gain
the insights & tools to create work that is right for them. For details or to sign up
for her free monthly e-zine, visit www.SuccessfromtheInsideOut.com
|
